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Written by Chuck LeBlanc
Understanding the Prison of Regret
Regret can be one of the most difficult emotional prisons to climb out of. It can trap you with reminders of things you didn’t do, say, or experience, or bombard you with things you did and wish you hadn’t. I often liken regret to a prison, a place where you may feel stuck in the past, unable to let go of painful reminders of perceived failures. This state can cause you to miss out on the present, fixated on punishing yourself with past mistakes.
What Is Regret Trying to Tell You?
But what is regret actually communicating to us? A better question might be, “what message does regret convey?” In my last article about emotions, I discussed how emotions provide feedback about our environment, values, and directions for our lives. Viewing regret through this lens may provide insight into its underlying message.
A Personal Memory of Regret
I’d like to share a memory that tormented me with regret for years:
A few years ago, I worked as an admissions advisor at a school, forming deep connections with my colleagues over three years. My last day at work in New Brunswick, before moving to Ottawa, was filled with emotions and well wishes. Yet, when it was my turn to express my gratitude, I was overwhelmed and left many things unsaid. This led to a long-lasting regret, feeling like I let my team and myself down.
What Was My Regret Trying to Say?
This regret haunted me until I understood its message. It was guiding me to recognize what was valuable to me and pointing to how I’d like to handle similar situations in the future. It urged me to reflect on myself, understand what I wanted to change, and learn to be compassionate about where I was on my journey.
Now, I see that I value expressing gratitude to those I care for and have grown more comfortable with my emotions.
Moving Forward with Compassion
We must remember that we cannot change the past. Compassion for our past selves, guided by our values, can help us shape our future actions and the type of person we want to be.
If you’re struggling with regret and looking to break free from this emotional prison, book an appointment with Chuck LeBlanc now and start your journey towards healing.
~Chuck
If you are looking to work through that prison of regret feel free to book an appointment with Chuck LeBlanc now.
613-701-7574 or email us at info@ksrc.ca
