TRANSFORM

TRAUMA COUNSELLING

All of our psychotherapists have experienced stress and trauma. They have the compassion that comes from knowing what it’s like to live through stress of all kinds and recover from it. All our therapy services are available virtually (by video or phone) or in person.

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR

  • You’re experiencing overwhelming fear and anxiety with no immediately identifiable cause.

  • You’re having trouble sleeping (and maybe nightmares).

  • Disturbing thoughts and images intrude into your everyday life.

  • Guilt, shame and self-blame (aka the “itty bitty shitty committee”) are your constant companions.

  • You sometimes feel like you’ve got two people inside you.

  • You feel sad or hopeless, disconnected or numb.

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR

  • You’re experiencing overwhelming fear and anxiety with no immediately identifiable cause.

  • You’re having trouble sleeping (and maybe nightmares).

  • Disturbing thoughts and images intrude into your everyday life.

  • Guilt, shame and self-blame (aka the “itty bitty shitty committee”) are your constant companions.

  • You sometimes feel like you’ve got two people inside you.

  • You feel sad or hopeless, disconnected or numb.

we’re here for you

YOU’RE TIRED OF

  • jumpiness or jitters,

  • self-criticism,

  • the confusion,

  • the difficulty concentrating or getting things done,

  • the overwhelming emotions.

You want relief

  • intrusive thoughts,

  • from the insomnia,

  • from the constant worrying and fear,

  • from the racing mind.

YOU WANT TO

  • silence the constant criticism in your head.

  • heal and enjoy yourself again.

  • use your own power and skills to change what you can in your life and accept what you can’t.

  • learn constructive ways to cope.

REQUEST AN
APPOINTMENT

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your appointment. Please wait for us to
contact you for confirmation.

we’re here for you

YOU’RE TIRED OF

  • feeling tense all the time,

  • having a short fuse,

  • the confusion,

  • the difficulty concentrating or getting things done,

  • the overwhelming emotions.

You want relief

  • from the effects of stress,

  • from the insomnia,

  • from the constant worrying,

  • from the racing mind.

YOU WANT TO

  • silence the constant criticism in your head.

  • enjoy yourself again.

  • use your own power and skills to change what you can in your life and accept what you can’t.

  • learn constructive ways to cope with stress.

REQUEST AN
APPOINTMENT

Filling out this form does not confirm
your appointment. Please wait for us to
contact you for confirmation.

THIS IS WHERE WE COME IN

It’s time for you to handle these symptoms and enjoy your life again.
Psychotherapy for trauma can help.

  • We understand how trauma, anxiety, and stress affect you and your life.
  • We know why trauma and stress symptoms seem to stick around forever.
  • We know how to work with your anxiety and other symptoms, so you can feel good, relax and respond effectively when the crap hits the fan.

MEET MEAGAN

As a survivor of sexual assaults and domestic violence I have an intimate understanding of the effects of trauma, allowing me to empathize and connect with my clients on a deeper level. Because I’ve done so much work on my own healing journey, I know how difficult it can be to find peace after such a wound; that’s why I’m so committed to validating my client’s experiences, empowering them with knowledge and tools, helping them recognize their intrinsic resilience, and supporting them in learning how to integrate and own their unique stories.

FAQs

First and foremost it’s a conversation, mostly between you and yourself, with company from your counsellor.

You know when you’re talking and you say something really insightful? Sometimes you say to yourself, “Hey! Did I just say that? I didn’t know that was going to come out of my mouth!” But sometimes you can totally miss your own insights and wisdom.

The counsellor’s role is to listen for what you say that is important, insightful or wise and say it back to you, so you can be sure not to miss it.

Counsellors can also play a consulting role. You’re coming for counselling support because you’ve hit a wall. You’ve got all kinds of skills and resources but somehow they’re not working any more. You’re saying, to yourself “I know all this good stuff, but it’s not getting me anywhere anymore.” In situations like that, your counsellor can be a consultant or a sounding board to help you troubleshoot and/or identify missing pieces. That’s where training comes in because, as a professional, a counsellor has information that might be useful, and will be happy to share that with you if you ask.

One of the things that makes stress really difficult is having to carry it all by yourself. A lot of the people who come for support are the go-to people for their families, friends and co-workers… and just about everyone else in their lives! They have always been strong, capable, competent people. That means they are carrying not only their own stuff, in a strong, competent, capable way, but also everyone else’s.

But then, who’s in your corner?

That’s where counselling comes in. A counsellor can help you carry the emotional weight of what’s going on in your life. Holding an emotion in increases the demand on your capacity—it takes energy to “put on a happy face”—and over time that can lead to symptoms like a shorter fuse, irritability, headaches, and trouble sleeping. If you have a place where you can let the emotions out, that is going to decrease your stress. You might have lots of people you can talk to in your life, and they might be very kind, helpful and understanding, but when you share heavy things with them, you might get a variety of reactions. They might get mad, or frustrated, or give you advice. Or maybe what you’ve shared comes back to you later, in a way you don’t really want it to.

A counsellor is a neutral person, so when you talk to them, they’re not going to get mad or upset, and are not going to put their nose in your business. You can leave your heavy stuff in the counselling office and there’s not going to be any negative impact on the rest of your life because your counsellor isn’t connected to it.

That’s the advantage of counselling: you get to bring it, say it, and if you want to leave it, it can stay at the counselling office. It won’t cause ripples in the rest of your life unless you choose to make those changes yourself.

When you’re stressed, you might feel emotionally overwhelmed. Maybe tears come out at the most inappropriate time, or maybe you snap when you shouldn’t. When this happens, it’s hard to think straight and problem-solve. This is a problem with how every human brain functions. When it’s emotionally overwhelmed, it can’t think. This is called cortical inhibition.

In these situations, your counsellor functions as an auxiliary brain so that the thinking parts of your brain can come back online, so to speak. Then you can relate to your emotions, rather than drown in them, and you can begin to use your problem-solving skills to address your problems.

Being hard on yourself is a hallmark of stress. We all have a tendency to be self-critical, but when stress is high, then the “itty, bitty shitty committee” in your head can make a lot of noise. Your counsellor can teach you tools that will help you be kinder to yourself. The inner bullying of that “itty, bitty shitty committee” is as harmful, over time, as being bullied from the outside. You may not be able to change your external conditions, but you sure can be kinder to yourself, and that removes one stressor from your plate. Plus, being nice to yourself, even if it’s only in your thoughts, counters the effects of external stressors. Whatever you have the power to change that reduces your stress is going to help you feel better.

The ultimate result of ongoing, constant stress is that your nervous system gets fried. To recover, it needs rest, soothing and nourishing. Just like a runner, the nervous system needs rest and recovery time between marathons if it’s going to get up and run another. And, let’s face it, life is full of stressors. Learning the signs so you can detect them early and act quickly to regulate your nervous system will help you cope better with stress, and prevent you from crashing and burning.

In your first session, the first step is to complete paperwork so your counsellor can complete your file. You’ll talk about policies: cancellation, payment, communication., confidentiality and safety.

The first thing most people say is, “I don’t even know where to start.,” so usually in the first session, the first question your counsellor will ask is something like, “What was happening that day that made you pick up the phone? What made you say, “Holy crap, I have to talk to someone!”?

After that, you talk and your counsellor listens. They listen in a particular way called active listening, where once in a while, they let you know they’re listening by telling you what they heard you say. They can also play a consulting role, helping you trouble-shoot and figure things out, if that’s what helpful for you.

The things that happen to a person as a result of stress can be really confusing and upsetting. So many people come to us asking, in one way or another, “Am I nuts?” or “What’s the matter with me?” A big part of a counsellor’s job is to reassure you you’re not crazy and there’s nothing wrong with you. Counsellor education and training teaches us what is to be expected when a person is experiencing overwhelming stress. Part of a counsellor’s job is to share that knowledge with you. You might not be feeling great about things, you might be stressed to the max, you might feel like you’re “going crazy,” but you’re OK. In other words, what you’re experiencing is normal, given what you’re going through.

Your counsellor will also support you in bringing an open and curious attitude toward what you’re saying and experiencing, and in slowing down to really hear it. You’ll hear your counsellor say things like, “Maybe we could pause here. What you just said sounds like it might be important.” Going slowly and being curious are tools that support paying attention, so you can get to know what’s happening now, thus making change possible. In fact, paying attention in an open and curious way can itself be change.

Some signs you may be ready for counselling:

  • You realize that you keep trying the same things and they do not work.
  • What you are doing to cope is interfering with some aspect of your life.
  • When you want to change your life and move forward.

Paradoxically, you may also be ready when you want to learn to accept and be compassionate toward yourself.

Is this you?

  • You feel like you’ve hit a wall somehow.
  • The things that you used to do aren’t working any more.
  • You’re feeling confused or like things don’t make sense.
  • You’re thinking something like, “I’ve been through a lot of shit in my life and I’ve always done fine until now, so what the hell is going on???”
  • You want to understand what’s happening to you so you can do something about it.
  • Other people have told you you’ve changed, that you’re not yourself, or not the way you used to be.
  • You’re snappier, angrier, sadder, more irritable, hard to be around, more down than you used to be.
  • You used to be a happy person and now you don’t laugh any more.
  • You feel tense all the time.

Maybe this is you

  • Your physical symptoms have gotten to a point where you say, “I have to do something.”
  • You can’t sleep and you’ve tried everything.
  • You have headaches and can’t seem to do anything about them.
  • You have digestive issues, you’ve tried everything but still they’re not resolved.

Or maybe this is you?

You’ve done it on your own so well for so long, but now you’re thinking, “Listen, I can’t do it on my own anymore. I want some help.” Or maybe you don’t want to do it on your own anymore. You’re thinking, “I’m sick and tired of doing it all on my own and I freaking deserve some help.”

Or maybe you’ve experienced one of the following:

  • high-demand work or workplace
  • demanding or difficult family situations
  • addiction or alcoholism in a family member
  • workplace bullying or harassment
  • a difficult childhood
  • an abusive relationship
  • sexual assault
  • childhood sexual abuse

If you said yes to one of more of the items above, counselling might be helpful. Click here to book a free, no-obligation, totally confidential free consultation to see if counselling is the next right step for you.

I hate to sound wishy-washy but it depends. Your goal might be something like, “I want to be happy” and that could take quite a while. But we can also take a look at how you know you’ll be happy and you might start noticing some of those things in a short amount of time. Maybe you have a very clear and specific goal. We can break it into small, manageable, do-able steps and you can make progress from week to week. Some people are like a seed, where you plant the seed and it has to decay before it can sprout and grow, so you might experience what we could call a front end load, where you need to put some time in. But then, seemingly all of a sudden, something happens. Reaching your goal is a very individual thing. It also depends on how open and ready you are to notice what is happening now and look at paths for change. Habitual patterns once served a good purpose, and they can also keep us from moving forward. Realizing how these patterns once kept you safe, as well as how they are now keeping you way from the life you want to lead is part of the process. You may also want to spend time with your fear of letting go of habitual patterns, since the part of you that is afraid may feel stronger than your wish to let go. It makes sense that part of you wants to let go and part of you doesn’t. Those habits originally had a good reason for being here. It can take time to see their good reason, or the needs they were intended to meet, and discover fresh ways to meet those needs.

Our client ambassador will answer your call. You’ll have an opportunity to ask questions that aren’t covered in this FAQ, and say a bit about the challenges for which you want support. When you’re ready, our client ambassador will book an appointment for you with the appropriate practitioner. At that point, they will take some basic info (phone number, email, etc.) and book a time to meet.

No. This is especially important in a small town where everybody knows everybody. It’s part of a counsellor’s ethical and legal responsibilities to protect your privacy, so what that comes down to is, in public, unless you say hi first, we will act as if we don’t know you. This is because our relationship is not a social one, it’s a counselling relationship, a therapeutic one, a sacred one.

Another way you’re protected is under Canadian and Ontario privacy laws, and under the laws that govern the practice of psychotherapy and social work. All counsellors here comply with these legal and ethical privacy requirements. There are only certain very specific and extremely limited conditions under which they can share your information without your permission: immediate danger to you or another adult, risk to someone who is under 16, or if the court subpoenas my files.

If any of these were to occur, we would talk about them at that time and decide what to do together. A counsellor’s ability to make the contribution they want to make in the world, to help make the world a better place, and make people’s lives more wonderful, depends entirely upon this sacred trust of confidentiality and privacy. Therefore everything is confidential, including everything you say and even the fact that you’re a client.

It’s no problem. If it’s a money issue, we can discuss a variety of options and the resources available in the area so that you can have ways to keep moving forward if money is a problem. If it has to do with things like time or life circumstances, you and your counsellor can troubleshoot together. Even if you decide counselling is not for you, that’s totally cool. Part of a counsellor’s is to be a resource-person, and direct you to all kinds of different resources for personal growth and support that are available in this area.

Counselling sessions last 50 minutes. Counselling fees range from $130 to $150 per 50-minute session. Receipts for reimbursement from insurance companies and income tax deductions can be issued. KSRC accepts all forms of payment but we prefer debit and credit.